Month Two

Would you think less of me if I said month two was pretty much a blur, too? 
I love taking care of them but when there is nothing that really distinguishes your days from your nights, you sort of lose track of yourself.  Seeing 1am...2am...3am...4am...5am is not pretty.  Take it from me. 

Just like their older sisters these babies love, love, love the bath. 
Madeleine used to fall asleep, too

We got packages from those we love with sweet, soft clothes. 

Thanks, Ruthie!

Enjoyed every single second of a fall rain storm.

Such a treat in the Land of Enchantment.

Although, they love the bath.  They despise getting out.

*Shiver*

Both of the babies were so much fussier than their sisters as brand new babies. 

It was hard.  Really hard.

The baby blues and anxiety would get to me at times.

Since I could not get myself some retail therapy or spa day 
and they seemed to do better with fresh air,

I often would sit on the back porch and remind myself how blessed I am.

Noelle asked for a photo shoot on this particular day.  

The babies loved to be swaddled and that has not changed. 

No swaddle = no sleep.

Auntie M sent some really cute outfits.

Every evening I ask Aaron the question,

"Who do you want?  Girls or babies?" 

This night he chose the babies. ♥

One evening for Family Night we roasted hot dogs and made s'mores on our fire pit. 

So very yummy....doing these kinds of things with the big girls is the best. 

But, the babies screamed the whole time. 

I hate having to decide who to take care of.  :(

We went to Noellie's school for a family BBQ. 

It is such a blessing that I am able to be home every day. 
It would pain me so to miss out on all these little things.

  Aaron's Grandma is the most amazing quilter.  But, as she has gotten older she is not able to do what she once could.  So, she recruited Aaron's Aunt Barbara to make quilts for the babies.  They are unbelievable!  One quilt in boy colors, the other in girl.  I will treasure them forever.

Spirit week at school.  Here is crazy day.  Only day I got a picture.  :(

 We loved spending afternoons in the backyard, enjoying the wonderful fall weather. 

Can I just say how much I LOVE having a landscaped backyard?! 

 So much better than the sand pit.

And just because she is so darn pretty...

Next up!  Month three, baby blessing, and Balloon Fiesta...

Month One

It's 4am, I can't sleep, and I don't have the patience to deal with blogger's unbearable formatting madness. This will have to do for now. Enjoy these precious little sweetie bums.

Let it suffice to say that the first month flew by, and I mean FLEW by in a flash.

Auntie and Unc came for a weekend.

Big sissies could not get enough of these babies. Especially, Noelle...

I had no idea what a little Mommy she would be!

Noelle is crazy about both of them.

She actually tries to love Courtney more because she's a girl.

But Adam is too irresistible.

Daddy did his fair share of snuggling!

Singing "Hush Little Baby"

Makes my heart hurt.

Love them both so much.

And someone started school! My kindergartner. Be still my heart.

Oh, how hard it was for me to send her off with Daddy. But all in all, he did a great job. She's gone every day from 9-4, with a half day on Wednesday. It's long but she does not mind a bit. We lucked out getting the best teacher in the whole school. Noellie loves every minute of being one of Mrs. Berglund's Bears.

Twice The Love

Here we are January 1, 2012 and I am back at blogging. Promise. Cross my heart.

Warning...it's long and there are a couple of graphic pictures.

I thought I would rewind to the birth of our babies and then do a quick re-cap of the past few months. Nothing big, but I will do my best. So, here goes....

Let me give a little background. Adam was baby A and breech. Courtney baby B and thought she owned the joint. Head down, breech, transverse, coiled around herself, you name it. When I first found out about the twins I realized I needed to be OK with a c-section because it was likely I would have one, and I thought I was. As time went on and Adam stayed breech I started to F-R-E-A-K out about it. I started doing every thing possible. Herbs, chiropractor, crazy yoga moves, hanging off the couch, heating pads, cold packs, flashlights, visualizing, prayer. LOTS of prayer. Constant prayer. It honestly consumed me. I doubt I have prayed more earnestly about anything. If a C-section was meant to be, why was Heavenly Father not taking the desire for a natural birth from me? I prayed His will be done and the babies get here the safest way possible but I still had such a desire of going into labor and naturally delivering the babies.

I had my last full blown Ultrasound at 36 weeks. Melissa was here visiting and helping me organize closets and get things ready, she was able to come with me to the appointment. The first words out of the techs mouth were, "That baby is head down." I was cautiously overjoyed. The energy in the room was electric. She had the doctor come in to confirm because she knew what it meant to me. It felt too good to be true. His head was still high but down.

 

The next week on Wednesday, I saw the midwife for Group B strep and a check. I was 4 cm dilated, baby's head was still really high but that is common in subsequent pregnancies. "I can't see how he would flip again, they are so big. You are going to labor beautifully!"

 

Saturday (August 6). I'd been having 'signs' that the babies were coming for a couple of weeks. But things had begun to pick up since seeing the midwife. We were doing our best to keep me walking and on my feet. Getting things done around the house, last minute shopping, getting Noelle ready for the upcoming school year. That night around 6 I was sure I was having real contractions and this was the night. We hung out for a few hours, I called Stephanie. Around 9:00 I told Aaron we needed to get ready, I felt really uneasy. I took a shower while he got the girls ready, I called the doctor and she told me to come on in. Sadly, that morning when I woke up I could feel that his head was no longer vertex. I was heartbroken but did what I could to remain positive. My mantra: what will be...will be. I had received two separate sets of quilts in the mail for the babies that day. They meant so much to me. I had spent so much time and energy on being sad, I was trying to focus on the joy.

 

We got to the hospital, checked in, and I got changed. The nurses were so excited to have a set of twins. How big was that belly? 54 inches!!!!!

Then we met Theresa. Not assigned to be our nurse but helping while the other nurse was in a delivery. Her first words were, "So, what ward are you in?" Her husband was a bishop in a ward on the East side. And she had twins herself. She hated to make me, but I had to get in the bed to get the monitors on. Ouch! She then got me situated so I could lean over the bed and breath through the contractions while we waited for the doctor to come and get an ultrasound to check the babies' positions.

We had a special connection right away. She had asked for the day off to visit with visiting family. But while driving over there they called her back in. As she turned her car around she prayed the Lord would confirm to her why she had to work instead of seeing her brother. We were her reason. She switched patients with the other nurse so she could stay with me. Most everyone with twins always told us how hard it was, when Aaron asked her how she felt she said, "I would do it again, no doubt." It was a perfect response.

 

Soon the on-call doctor was there (my Dr. was out of town) and we saw right away Adam was now transverse, with his little leg hanging down into my pelvis. I was almost 6 centimeters and the bag of water was bulging. If my water broke it could be disastrous. C-section it would have to be. I sobbed. As much as I tried to prepare myself and in my heart of hearts I knew this would be the outcome, I was still overcome. After everything, this was how it was all going down. They left us alone for a while.

The doctor did another ultrasound, still transverse and looking like if he was moving at all it was breech. Waiting more to see if he would turn during labor would be dangerous. Within minutes they had me ready and walking in to the operating room.

 

Aaron waited outside while they did the spinal. I was so nervous for it, but it really did not hurt. Soon, Aaron was by my side.

At 1:35 AM....I was a Mommy to a baby boy.

 

One minute later 1:36 AM...my third baby girl.

Holy Moly. There they were.

Daddy went with them to the recovery room while they waited for me to get put back together. They were checked again and weighed. Adam Everett 6lbs 1oz. ~ Courtney Ann 7lbs 4oz.

The rest of the surgery went fine. The right side was really painful, so they gave me some medicine through the IV.

 

Finally, I got to meet my babies. I will never forget what Aaron looked like holding them, the look on his face. "Who's who?" He asked. I guessed wrong.

We got to spend a little time in there with Theresa. She helped me latch on both babies. They nursed great, just like their big sissies. As she filled out paperwork, her eyes filled with tears. She felt so honored to play a part in building our eternal family. Renewed hope in prayer because hers was answered that night. She felt hope as she filled out the section where it asked who was at the Mother's bedside. She rarely gets to write in 'Husband.' It's always 'baby's father' 'grandmother' 'friend.' Everyone thanked me several times for having such big, appropriate for their gestational age babies, apparently it saved them a lot of time and paperwork.

 

The rest of the night was kind of a blur. The pain on the right side was still strong. Aaron snoozed while the nurse came in and out. They took Courtney to the nursery for a check because she would grunt each time she breathed out, a strong indicator of respiratory distress, but she was fine.

 

The nurses were wonderful especially, Angela, she took such great care of us. Made me mint tea to clear the congestion from the anesthesia, helped me to the bathroom, warm sponge baths, held my hand and walked me around the unit. Claudette was the night nurse and she was wonderful, as well. After they lost more than 10% of their birth weight, we had to supplement with 5ml of formula after each feeding, for just one day. Then my milk was in and they did fine.

Angela giving Courtney her first bath. She was thrilled, obviously.

After church on Sunday Stephanie brought the girls to meet their new brother and sister. Love at first sight X 2!

I got up and walked often trying to get my strength back but the pain was crazy. And I mean crazy. Everyone said it's yucky, but it was beyond that. Way beyond. I knew it was not right. The nurses kept asking if I wanted to just take one pain pill instead of two but one did nothing. One doctor who came in for rounds was concerned about how I was feeling and that the right side of my uterus had yet to contract down. But, the doctor who did my surgery was not concerned. She thought given that the babies were so big, and I had so much fluid, it would take me longer to heal.

 

Wednesday evening we left for home. I post this picture because it makes me laugh. Why would that lady who took the picture not tell me my stomach was hanging out?!?!

SERIOUSLY?!?!

That afternoon my cousin Emily had flown in. She only was able to come for a couple days, but oh how I needed and appreciated her. She just took over the girls and I was able to take care of the babies. I will forever be grateful to her. Aaron worked while she was here so he could be with me the next week.

The next few days were special and awful. Again, the pain was so intense. I could barely hobble around. Aaron got a huge ladder so I could spend 15 minutes very carefully getting in and out of our really high bed.

 

Thursday my incision looked worse, I thought it should be healing?

Friday, I laid in bed all afternoon with the chills. Stephanie ran to the store for me to get some antibiotic cream because the right side of the incision had opened up and looked awful. Finally, we called the hospital and they told me to come in right away. I could not stand the thought of that. So, we called Brother Rohm in our ward, he is a doctor. He came right over, heaven bless him!!! The minute he look at my tummy, he asked how long it had looked like that. Not good. He said the infection looked advanced and he would call in two different antibiotics. Long story short, the medicine did it's job. Healing was long and slow. But we're all healthy and (mostly) happy.

Stay tuned for the next chapter!

More Than Doubly Blessed...

Last week we had out 18 week ultrasound. The babies are PERFECT. The tech took her time and did all the measurements twice and then Dr. Gonzalez (perinatologist) came in and double checked everything and spent a great deal of time on their hearts.

Our Baby Boy

Our Baby Girl

Sweet Baby Girl in 3D

Baby boy was not very cooperative and she could not get him in 3D.

I think she absolutely has Madeleine's little button nose!

They are laying in the transverse position, across my belly, feet to feet. Baby brother pulled his feet over his head and his sister spent her time kicking and kicking him in a not so friendly spot. Stinker. :)

They both came in weighing 8oz (lower side of normal, but just fine.) One placenta is nice and high while the other is low but mostly likely will move up as the uterus stretches. To say we are doubly blessed is an understatement. I still am in awe that Heavenly Father picked us to be the parents of these perfect angels. I will be driving or doing whatever...suddenly I start thinking of them and the tears just flow. I love them so much already. Aaron is BEYOND excited, I've never seen him this way. And the two big sisters can't wait to meet their 'TWO BABIES!'

I have been feeling fine...I guess. Most of the nausea is gone and I have felt some energy coming back but about three weeks ago I started having a sore throat and my voice went hoarse. I could not imagine what it was. It was getting worse and worse. I finally saw Dr. Teicher and after some hemming and hawing he realized, "It's reflux!" He told me to take any over the counter acid reducer. Of course I turned to the trusty internet, this describes my symptoms to the T! I started Prilosec, saw some improvement but not enough, then I added Zantac (they work differently so you can pair them up), again more improvement but not enough. I finally called the Dr. again on Monday and got no call back. Called again Tuesday and there was no record of my message. I almost broke down with the nurse. I'd had enough. It would wake me at night, my kids could never understand me, and so on. He called in a prescription for Tagament. Let's hope this is it.

Tuesday night I started getting sick and I mean sick. Body aches, chills, throbbing head, stomach. Wednesday morning I just lost it and was a blubbering mess, poor Aaron had to leave me that way. I just felt like I could not handle it any more. I've felt terrible since Christmas...nausea, throwing up, exhaustion, sinus infections, flu, reflux. It was the last straw. After making such a scene, I felt a little better, and we toughed out most of the day. I finally gave in and took some ibuprofen and I felt a million times better.

Hopefully, this is it because I need to enjoy this 'honeymoon' phase!

I Haven't Died...Just yet

I am sure most people have long since abandoned me and my poor blog. I feel sad that I have neglected it for so long. But I have a good excuse! Or do I? Is there a good excuse for not documenting the lives of my precious babes? Let's see what I have to share...this is gonna be long!

Christmas was wonderful! We enjoyed every minute of it. I loved being able enjoy both aspects of the holiday with the girls: the blessed birth of our Savior and the magic of Santa Claus. One of my favorite things was when we were setting up the Nativity I asked Noelle if she remembered what it was about and she answered, "Um? Something about someone named Nick?"

Our first Christmas away from family was a special time. We had friends over for Christmas Eve and then Christmas day home together as a family. Our Christmas morning will always remain one of the most special memories in my heart. We (I) missed our extended family dearly, but loved the being able to do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted to. Food, naps, playing with toys.

Christmas day was when I really noticed that my tummy felt icky and just plain weird. I didn't even cook the big Christmas dinner I'd planned. The week before I felt really run down and just thought it was all the holiday hull-a-ba-loo.

Two days later we loaded the car down and headed West to California. Auntie kept her tree up (usually that baby is out the door on the 26th!!!) and we celebrated Christmas #2. By now, I was downright nauseous all the time and I knew exactly what it was. No one who has ever experienced those feelings ever forgets it! But, I could not believe it and decided to just wait.

On the 29th, my niece, Evynn and I went to do some shopping together. I did a quick stop at the Dollar Store and asked her to just wait in the car. That night when we got home I snuck off to the bathroom with my purse and took a pregnancy test. That sucker came out positive in no less than a nano-second! This was slightly strange because I thought I was barely 4 weeks along and when I took tests with the girls well into the 5th/6th week the positive line barely showed up.

I was in a predicament (I thought) because although I felt it was time to have a baby, it was strange to not necessarily want a baby. I love babies. I love being a Mommy. And I knew I wanted more children. And Aaron in no way wanted a baby. The move, his new job, being far away from family, recovering financially from what we'd been through. It was a long ways off for him. Oh, well! The Lord had other plans for us! I could not decide when to tell him. I did not want to keep it from him, but he was enjoying his vacation, I just felt so awful already and could not figure out when to tell him. Bizarre, I know, he's my husband for crying out loud! But, it's how I felt.

The 30th was Noelle's 5th birthday. She woke up to balloons, streamers, gifts, and all sorts of festivities! We went to a nature reserve with friends, out to lunch, and had a blast. 5 seems so big, I cannot believe how the time has gone. She is so dang smart, funny, outgoing, athletic, and loving. She is the joy of my heart

Finally, on New Year's day, I told Auntie I was pregnant and started crying my eyes out. One more thing to be experienced away from everyone I love so dearly. She told me in not so many words to buck up and tell my darn husband. So, I did. And cried my eyes out again. And felt so relieved because he was actually happy!

By now I was feeling sick, sick, sick and just terrified because I was barely 5 weeks! What was in store? Evynn had stayed the week with us and had come down with a terrible flu and I was feeling that coming on, too. Not fair at all!

The trip home was mis.er.able. I felt like death, coughing, gagging, throwing up, head aches, body aches, fever, you name it. Somehow we survived it.

After talking to several people here and some research I decided what OB I wanted (major shortage around here) and called for an appointment but they could not get me in until Valentine's day. I'd be 11.5 weeks, but decided it was worth it to see someone great. I could not believe that I was not going to have my Cooper. :(

This time I experienced every pregnancy symptom known to man! With the girls I was just ridiculously nauseous and could not stand any type of food. But this time smells were killing me, constant gagging, potty all the time, I felt so sick but always felt like I needed something to eat. Usually everything sounded horrible, but sometimes I would crave a certain something and that had to be it....taco bell, Cup of Noodles, KFC mashed potatoes. I wanted to die! And almost killed myself driving to the store late one night during some horrible weather. I basically ice skated in the car for that darn Cup of Noodles. :)

Finally, the 14th arrived and we were excited! Waiting in the lobby the smell of McDonald's french fries was killing me. Aaron swears he smelled nothing but I knew somewhere in that building someone was eating those things. Ick.

The nurse was exceptionally nice (a big change from Cooper's office) and Aaron told her all would be well as long as she made sure that we did not have twins like the poster that hanging on the wall. Ha!

Then the doctor came in and my heart sank again missing Cooper. There was no booming voice coming down the hall telling people, "To hell with it all!" No hugs or kisses, no Mormon jokes, no stories about movies he saw. But, again Dr. Teicher was so dang nice, easy going and took plenty of time to talk to us about everything. He is for sure no Cooper, but I'll take what I can get. Finally, it was time to hear the heart beat, it took a minute our two and there it was, loud and strong! Always such a relief. His joke was, "Well, what I am not telling you is about the second heartbeat I hear in there. Ha! Ha!" Another bummer was no ultrasound on your first visit like Facey. But when he felt my tummy and measured my uterus, it was measuring a month ahead of where I thought I was. Now, given I wasn't planning this, I just had to guess when my last cycle was because I honestly could not remember. All joking aside he said he just thought my dates were off and there were not twins, a whole month ahead was too much for twins at this stage anyway. He ran a couple doors down to the Ultrasound tech and asked if she could squeeze me in, to make sure of dates. She said no problem and told the next people she'd be 5 minutes late. She was a little more than 5 minutes late!

The second she put the transducer on my stomach there was no mistake that there were two babies. My heart began to beat out of my chest and I thought she just had the machine on the wrong setting, split screen or something. You could tell the poor lady suddenly became nervous. Then she began mumbling that she needed to get the doctor to tell us this. She went back to change the setting and thought, "See, I was right!" Finally, you could see both of them again and Aaron burst out, "That is two babies!" And she nodded her head and asked him to step out and get the doctor. I began laughing. And could not stop. The rest is kind of a blur. Dr. Teicher came in and said all looked great. Aaron had his head in his hands mumbling who-knows-what and I just kept on laughing. She had to ask me several times to relax because she could not get the measurements. It was a priceless experience!

Apparently, my guess was off because I was actually 13 weeks. Yea! I saw the perinatologist two days later for repeat ultrasound & measurements, met with the genetic counselor, and a quick visit with the doctor (Love him too! Cute, little, chubby man with a super thick Hispanic accent and you just want to put him in our pocket and take him home.) Again, really thorough and so accommodating. Sent me home with homework, reading, and a vitamin list (it's insane!) And the weight they want you to put on early in pregnancy is out of this world, too. Don't they know I've basically been on a diet since I was 12 and learned about fat grams?! It's really unfortunate because although I HAVE to eat every three hours or get sick, nothing really tastes all that great. I have a license to pig out and can't use it. :(

We are so blessed to have this experience, there is no doubt these babies were meant to come to our family. It's overwhelming at times, but immeasurable joy at the same time.

That's enough for now. What a novel! Pictures to come.

Tuesday I see Dr. Techier. Wednesday I see the Peri for a more in depth appointment and Ultrasound.

Boys? Girls? Both? What's your guess?

Zoo & River of Lights

Yesterday was a wonderful day as a family.

After a big breakfast of my awesome homemade waffles we cleaned up and the house and headed to the zoo in the afternoon.

It was great to have no schedule and no where to be.

We had yet to realized the extent of Madeleine's extreme fear of animals.

(We just thought it was the big cow that stands outside the Chick-Fil-A, but we were wrong!)

See the picture of that giraffe? He was so close!

The zoo keepers were cleaning up leaves and he was right there snacking on the leftovers.

M lost her mind over that giraffe, and the zebras, and the Rhinos, and the Lions.

Apparently, they need to be behind glass for her to enjoy them.

Then we had some bird trauma.

We were lucky enough to be there during feeding time and saw some vultures (I believe) eating rats (eeeek!), it was pretty amazing. They have these ravens that climb on their back to try and get at their food. Noelle was standing there holding onto the fence when one of the ravens came and landed right where her sweet little fingers were. Scared the daylights out of both of us!

Lastly, as we were on our way out Noelle and Daddy stopped at the potty. While we were waiting, one of the many peacocks that wonder around the zoo grounds started to approach us. I could not believe how close it was getting, then it was only inches away, then it cocked it's head to the side and nipped Madeleine's finger! I guess it was after the leftover crackers still stuck there. I had to make a fool out of myself...flailing...yelling...jumping to get the thing to scatter off.

Then we headed over to the Botanical Gardens for the annual "River of Lights."

Amazing!!! Any and every animal you could imagine was lit up. And they moved! Butterflies flew, elephants spit water, mountain lions ran across the top of fences.

The only draw back? We forgot gloves. Brrrrrr!!!